Despicable Me
by Professor Cheesecake
Summary: The most popular girl in school, pretty and loved by everyone around her, including herself. A Goth girl, independant and proud, compassionate and kind, if not a little stubborn. Why oh why would their self esteem plummet so quickly?


**You ac****tually don't have any proof that I'm _not _Butch Hartman. You'll just have to take my word for it...**

If she had legs, they would be crossed right now. As it was, her ghostly tail was curled up under her, with her elbow on her... knee... and her fist propping up her head. Desiree was currently low on power, despite being in the human realm, where people tended to make enough wishes to create the equivalent of a power feast. Unfortunately, her reputation got there long before she did; people had caught on to the fact that there was occasionally a wishing ghost haunting Amity Park, and the phrase 'I wish' was rarely ever uttered, even around a wishing well, where they usually just thought it. She couldn't grant unsaid wishes!  
She was resting in an abandoned warehouse located as close as she dared to the Fenton portal without being close enough to set off that blasted Danny Phantom's ghost sense. She was feeling somewhat desperate; if she couldn't grant any wishes, she couldn't gain power, and without that power she couldn't get home. At least in the ghost zone her power levels didn't matter all that much, and if she ever was low on power, she'd grant one of her friends a wish. Back there, they appreciated her sense of humor.

So how on Earth was she going to find someone _stupid _enough to make a wish to a genie who warped and twisted any wish you made?

"So like, yesterday? Mark Harrigan, from chemistry? Yeah, he like, found out I liked him, so today, he, like, asked me out, right? But by then, I, like, didn't like him anymore? So I told him I had to wash my hair, like, _yeah_."

"Ohmigosh, Nica, that's genius!"

"Yeah, totally, right? Anyway, I, like, have to go home? See you later, Paulina."

"Bye."

As her friend left, the dark haired Latina wandered off to find one of her other friends; hopefully Starr, her satellite. She reached into her bag for her compact mirror and lipstick - might as well multitask, right? She opened each of them up and began applying her make up.

Suddenly, a green face appeared in the mirror right behind her. She shrieked, and dropped her mirror, and it shattered as it hit the concrete.

Thankfully, she'd been surprised while beautifying herself often enough to not make a colorful stain all over her face.

The green face, which contained bright red eyes, one of which was hidden by ebony hair, floated in front of her, along with the rest of her body. She looked like a gypsy, like the one that had read Paulina's palm at the fair last summer-however, the gypsy had been bogus. She'd told her that she was _shallow_, for goodness' sake!

Paulina and this new ghost stared at each other for at least a minute, before Paulina finally got the hint, and broke the silence.

"...Hi?

Desiree grinned. This girl would be remarkably easy to fool. "Hello, girl, do you know who I am?"

Paulina made a face; she didn't look very pretty when she was thinking. Probably why she didn't do it very often. "You're a ghost." she stated plainly, "and you look like that genie that called me shallow-and said that I was in love with a _geek_!"

Desiree dropped about a foot, leaning towards Paulina sympathetically; this was going faster than she thought. "But you're not in love with an outcast, are you?" she asked. Paulina shook her head, brushing a strand of dark hair behind her ear.

"Who are you in love with, girl?"

The Latina stood in confusion for just a moment, not expecting this question. It registered in her brain and her eyes grew large and hopeful, her lips into a lovesick smile, and her hands clasped together up near her neck, her head cocked to one side. All in all, she looked like a lovesick Disney princess. "Danny Phantom," she cooed, "the _ghost _boy."

Now was her chance. "Allow me to introduce myself," she said, floating upwards and holding herself upright in a proud fashion, head slightly turned to the sky, but still keeping her prey within sight, "I am Desiree, the wishing ghost; your heart's desire is my command!"

Paulina's mouth opened and closed, as if she wanted to say something, before falling into a rather comical 'o' shape.

'_Wel_l,' thought Desiree, '_this is rather disappointing..._'

"So you're, like, that genie everybody's talking about? I mean, like, everyone says to stay away from you."

Desiree's shoulders slumped into a slouch, and she couldn't help but glare at the girl. "Yes, that is what everyone _says_, isn't it?" she said, as she regained her proud posture, "but everybody used to say that the ghost boy was evil as well, did they not?" she said, appearing to be wallowing in self-pity.

"Oh." there was a pause. "So you're, like, not evil?"

"No," Desiree agreed, red eyes flashing, "I'm not. I'm just a lonely little genie, who wants to grant someone a wish," she said, lowering her voice and flying in closer to Paulina, whispering as if sharing her deepest secret, "and nobody trusts me, so I can't get _home_."

Paulina said nothing, turning her head as the green ghost flew in circles around her. She was starting to realize that this was a _genie_, a _wishing _ghost. She could get what she always wanted-she had the means to get it flying around her head.

"But what do I wish _for_?" she mumbled quietly. There were so many things...

"Anything you like, girl..." Desiree coaxed, "beauty... brains... money... success..." she paused for a dramatic effect, smirking behind her, regaining her look of pity as she circled in front, "_Love_."

"Love," repeated Paulina, as if hypnotized, "Love..." her blue eyes sparked with inspiration, and she looked up at the genie, excited as can be.

"Have you decided, young one?"

She nodded eagerly, her bright red lips forming a greedy grin. "I wish that I was-no...I...I wish that Danny Phantom loved me!" she practically shrieked, jumping up and down as if over a skipping rope.

Desiree smiled her trademark smile, eyes growing an angry red. "So you have wished it, so shall it be...!"

She waved her hands, and a sparkling mist surrounded the ignorant girl, and her eyes closed as her knees gave way and she collapsed on the ground. It only took a few moments for her eyes to reopen, but instead of the usual blue, her eyes were purple.

"What happened..." she mumbled raising a hand to her head. She paused halfway through to stare at her perfectly manicured hand. Alarmed now, she looked around, close to panicking before her gaze landed on Desiree.

"What. Did. You. _Do_." she growled, contrasting greatly from the ditsy girl Desiree had talked to only moments earlier.

"I granted her her wish." said Desiree, crossing her arms over her chest proudly.

"I wish you'd tell me what she wished for, and no dirty tricks this time!" she demanded, jumping to her feet. Desiree smiled-she had enough power to go _home _now.

"She wished that Danny Phantom loved her. Danny Phantom loves you, so I turned her into you; and you had to go _somewhere_, so now you're her."

The Latina stared at her in horror, blood rushing to her face to make a brilliant brush upon her tanned cheeks. "I don't-we aren't-_he doesn't love me_!" she denied loudly. She took a moment to calm down, then turned to face the genie, who was currently grinning impishly. "W-where is she now?"

"I don't know; where were you before you collapsed?"

"Well..." she said, thinking, not taking her eyes off of Desiree.

**Flashback**

_"I'm just saying, guys, that it's wrong to experiment on animals. Little Gus here is a perfect example." said Sam Manson, holding up a cage with her fingerless gloved hand. The cage contained a small lizard, which was glowing an unnatural shade of purple._

_"Sam," said Danny Fenton, blue eyes watching the lizard known as 'Gus' carefully, "that's a ghost. My ghost sense goes off around it."_

_Sam blinked down at the little lizard curiously, then looked back to Danny, ignoring Tucker, who had fallen off the bench laughing. "Well." she said haughtily, "how do you think Gus died? Why else would he be haunting Axion Labs?"_

_"Somebody could've stepped on it." said Tucker simply, "besides, why were you haunting Axion Labs?"_

_"Animal Rights protest. Where did you think I was during Math?" She said, setting Gus down on the ground; he wasn't hurting anybody. Yet._

_"Skipping." said her two friends simultaneously._

_Sam arched an eyebrow. "That's what I was doing, idiots."_

**End Flashback**

Meanwhile, on Paulina's side...

"She's got a p-Sam?" began Tucker, cutting off as Sam slumped over. Danny caught her just as she was about to hit the ground, and laid her on the bench carefully, and the boys leaned over her.

"Sam?" they shook her, hoping to awaken her. "Sam?"

She was being shaken, and somebody was saying the name Sam, for whatever reason. He sounded like Danny Phantom! Maybe Danny Phantom had a friend who was a medic, and his name was Sam...maybe he was cute. She could introduce him to Starr...she was sure her friend would like that...she certainly needed a medic, the way her head felt.

"Sam? Sam, are you alright?"

She opened her eyes, ready to gush to Danny Phantom about how he'd saved her. Except, instead of Danny Phantom, her eyelids revealed Danny Fenton...and his friend. Bad Luck Tuck...whatever his last name was.

"Sam, are you alright?" asked Fenton, eyes shining with concern. Sam? Who on Earth was Sam? And where was Danny Phantom?

"Do you think this has anything to do with Gus?" asked Bad Luck Tuck.

"Who's Gus?" she asked, curiosity getting the better of her.

Fenton and Back Luck Tuck exchanged glances. "Sam?" asked Fenton, "what's the last thing you remember?"

Her eyes narrowed. They were talking to her like she was stupid-she was _not _stupid, whatever the teachers said! In fact, they were the stupid ones; they were calling her Sam, that was a guys name.

She stood up off the bench, noticing that her feet felt heavy. Looking down, she saw she was wearing a pair of bulky black boots-very unfashionable. Danny Phantom would fall out of love with her as soon as he saw her in these - assuming the wish worked.

"My name isn't _Sam_, losers," she spat, relishing in the startled and offended looks that she received, "I'm _Paulina_. The last thing I remember is a _very _nice genie granting my wish that Danny Phantom was in love with _me_. So excuse me if I go find him!" She said, shoving past the two of them. For whatever reason, instead of apologizing to her, Bad Luck Tuck had burst out laughing, saying something that sounded a lot like "_Proof_!"

She ignored him as she went on her search. However, she had only taken a few steps before she tripped over something, falling to the ground.

Looking back, it turned out to be a cage, containing a glowing purple lizard. Eeeww...

"S-er, Paulina!" called a voice, as she stood up. It was Fenton.

"What do you want, loser?" she said, holding her head high.

"Look," he said, digging through a spider backpack and pulling out a small black mirror. She rolled her eyes and looked into her reflection, just in case her make up was messed up.

This was _not _what she expected.

* * *

The high heels that had been on her new feet were in the purse she'd found in her hand, and she ran barefoot through the grass to the park. She couldn't remember exactly where she and her friends had been hanging out, but it was _somewhere _around here. If Paulina was with them, in her body-she did not want to know how her body looked right now. She just wanted to switch back...somewhere in the back of her mind, it occurred to her that it was probably a dumb idea to ditch Desiree...ah well, too late now.

There was a scream that sounded remarkably like hers in the distance. Oh, crap...at least she knew where to go now. She changed directions to follow the scream, finally remembering where she had been.

She wasn't the only one following the scream, she noticed, as she ran to her friends. Concerned citizens were following the scream, probably shaken by the fear heard in the scream as well as a girl following the scream. She couldn't see herself, but she had the feeling that her expression wasn't the most calm...

She finally spotted herself, which in itself was a very..._strange _experience. She cringed; why did Paulina have to scream and cry like that? If she was going to do it, she might as well do it in her own body.

Tucker spotted the running girl first. He waved her over, grinning like an over-excited child. It confused her; why was he so happy to see her? His usual reaction to her was just, well, _normal_. How one would usually greet their best friend. At the moment, though, he looked more like she was presenting him a PDA that came from twenty years into the future.

Her answer came when she caught up to him and he didn't quite meet her eyes...

She glared. "Tucker. My eyes are up here, idiot." she said, panting. Wasn't Paulina supposed to be a cheerleader? How on Earth could she be so unfit?

He reluctantly looked her in the eyes. "Please tell me you're Sam and not a second Paulina." he said.

She finally straightened up. "I'm Sam." she clarified. "And now I'm going to make sure that that goody-goody prep gets what's coming to her."

Her posture proud, she walked directly up to the Paulina inhabiting her body, currently curled up in a ball on the ground, where a blushing Danny was doing his best to comfort her.

"Technically, you're always seen with me and Tuck, it's not like it will hurt, um, Paulina's reputation...uh, I mean, um..."

"B-but my w-wish was for Danny Phantom to fall in l-l-l-love with me!" came Paulina's sobs, voice muffled from having her new face buried in Sam's skirt, "how w-w-will he fall in love with me when I look, li-like _this_!" she started sobbing uncontrollably again.

"Well, I'm sure that, uh, Danny Phantom won't really, uh, care how you look...and besides, you look really pretty, uh, now, anyway." Danny was blushing harder than ever.

Paulina raised her head-at least he had accomplished _that_. Unfortunately, she had arranged Sam's features into a glare, directed at him. "Of course you think that, you're in love with the Goth _freak_!" she spat, and slapped him.

Sam, who had been watching, curious, decided it was time to step in. "Excuse me? I'm a freak? Well, look who's gone and trusted a strange wishing ghost that Danny Phantom has recommended not to talk to! I'd rather be a freak than an idiot, thank you!" she said. Both Danny and Paulina looked in her direction. Danny, who had been blushing even worse than before (if that was even possible) widened his eyes when he saw her, and a small squeaky sound escaped from his throat. He quickly left the area; Sam thought that he probably had a nosebleed.

Paulina, however,froze at the sight of her, then slowly stood up. She was silent for a moment, before quietly telling her, "Well, apparently, you are the idiot here. I can find that genie and wish us back." her expression twisted into a crazy grin, before raising the volume of her voice, "Hey everybody! Look at me! I'm a Goth FREAK! I'm in love with my best friend, and I refuse to tell anybody about it!" she said, twirling around as if to show off.

Sam's eyes-the only part of her that she could say was hers at the moment, actually- widened. Well, that was a low blow. Might as well make one of her own.

"Hey everybody!" she said, waving her arms to make sure everyone saw her-and by now, there was quite a crowd. "I'm a little tramp who has six boyfriends! Or, wait..." she said, pausing, trying to make it look like she was thinking, "was it seven?" she asked, ending with a pout.

Paulina glared, furious. Apparently she hadn't expected for Sam to retaliate. "Oh, yeah?" she called, "Well, uh, I'm emo! And I do drugs!" she said, relishing the looks of surprise from the crowd, slowly getting bigger. Somebody-Sam recognized him as a kid in her homeroom-had a video camera out.

A determined expression found its way onto Sam's face. "Yeah? Well, these-" she indicated her chest area "-aren't real!"

Paulina gasped, and Sam had to refrain from laughing. She hadn't realized how fun it would be to mess with the Queen-Bee's reputation. Not having much of one herself, Sam couldn't care less about rumors.

"W-w-well, I-I...I haven't had a shower in weeks!" shrieked Paulina, grasping for straws already. When mumbles of disgust rippled through the crowd, she nodded, encouraged. "Yeah! So I, like, smell, like, worse-r than a skunk!"

Sam winced. Worse-r? Seriously? She rolled her eyes. "You know all this jewelry?" she jangled her bracelets around for emphasis. "I pay for it with the money from my side-job. You can find me on the street corner!" she said, smiling brightly.

Paulina froze. She hadn't expected that. She raised her hand to point at Sam-in-her-body, then lowered it when she saw the black gloves and nail polish. Instead, she wordlessly started walking. Sam thought she was going to punch her at first, when she went in the wrong direction, instead towards Danny and Tucker.

Sam was about to open her mouth to ask what she was doing, when she grabbed Danny-who currently had a tissue to his nose-and kissed him. Right on the lips. In front of everybody.

Oh, no.

No, no no no.

Sam figured that, even if it was some weird form of self-harm, one of them was going to come out of this bleeding. At least Paulina would be physically fine when she got her body back...

* * *

Sam, still as Paulina, walked into school, then realized that she didn't know Paulina's locker number or classes for the day. She decided to find Tucker and Danny; might as well damage the school princess' reputation at least a little more. Although walking with Tucker and Danny wouldn't really do much to it anymore, she mused. Danny had been the one to show her where Paulina's house was; after he had stopped his nose from bleeding any longer, though. It had been a rather silent journey...

She hadn't even made it into the right hallway when Mr Lancer walked in front of her, stopping in front of her, obviously wanting to talk to her. Oh, this would be fun.

"Ms. Sanchez..." he began, before sighing, noticing her outfit. She was wearing an oversized t-shirt and sweatpants, making the trendy teen look anything but. "Look, just come to the office with me, please. Have you seen Ms Manson?"

She grinned. "Nope." she replied, popping the 'p'. "Don't plan to, either. She's so much nicer than me? I like, don't deserve it. I'm rude, preppy, and only act nice to you because it's the only way I won't fail school. If you weren't my teacher, I wouldn't hesitate to call you old, fat, and ugly." she said.

He glared at her, then grabbed her arm, dragging her behind him to the office. He put her rather forcibly into one of the uncomfortable office chairs, then left. He came back soon with Paulina, who was wearing a pink dress. Sam's blood boiled. A _pink _dress? How dare she!

Paulina widened her eyes when she saw the outfit Sam had dressed her body in. She whimpered a little, but left it at that.

Soon, Principle Ishyama came out of the office, with a blonde woman that Sam didn't recognize. A quick glance to the girl inhabiting her body-it was still a strange sight, admittedly-revealed that Paulina didn't recognize her either.

"Girls," Principal Ishyama said, "your parents called. They said that you've been acting oddly lately, with very little self esteem." she said, before mumbling something about parents who jumped to conclusions overnight. Sam couldn't help but agree with her-it was only yesterday that they'd started acting like this.

"So this is your councilor, Mrs. Parker. She's here to help you raise your self esteem back to where you'll be perfectly happy again. Any questions?"  
Both girls shook their heads, eyes wide in horror.

Maybe this wasn't as fun as they thought it would be...

**Y'like? I thought the ending was a tad bit rushed. *shrugs* whatever. It's a nice li'l oneshot, ain't it? And if you agree with me, you'll drop a review. And if you like my writing style, you might even wanna check out my other stories. Y'know, like, say, _Similarities_, or...I don't know, _She Noticed_...but hey, that's your choice ^^  
And I know that the concept of Paulina and Sam switching bodies is often used, but I don't think I've ever seen it this way before. I got the idea when I was talking with my mom about the movie "Despicable Me", and realised that if somebody didn't know that it was a movie, they would think we had very low self-esteem. It was helped along by the fact that my little brother wouldn't stop listening to "You're A Mean One, Mr Grinch" around Christmastime. It has a lot of insults in it. Like _'I wouldn't touch you with a tewnty one and a half foot pole_'...I don't know if I quoted that right, though. It's from memory. **

**Now, recenzi! Recenzo! (Google it. Tip: it's in esperanto)**


End file.
